We are, we have become, consumption robots, consumer automatons.
Within a free-enterprise system, it is the business of companies and corporations and industry to build demand for their products or services. Without demand for and the consumption of their goods and/or services, there is no reason for their existence. They will not exist. This is simple economics. For those who are persuasive enough to convince you that you need “x,” and that their version of “x” is better then that other company’s version of “x,” they will prosper economically. There is a difference, however, between persuasion and manipulation.
What has happened over the last few decades is that the extent of social manipulation by “Madison Ave.” – the advertising agents of their client companies – has become so pervasive and the public’s willingness to be manipulated so complete that we have become nothing much more than consumption tools, robots, automatons.
This was brought home to me in a fundamental way right after the 9/11 attacks. Our President was very fiery in his speech about retaliation and defeating the enemies of America. Yet, the solution he boldly declared to the average American citizen was that we should go shopping. Go buy more stuff… go collect more goods… go make your “mountain-o-things” even bigger (as Tracey Chapman sang about). Now, I know that what he was suggesting was that we continue on with our daily lives so to not “give the victory to the enemy.” See, you didn’t destroy our resolve… you didn’t succeed in demoralizing us… etc. Well, is that all that we are? Is the demonstration of our national resolve, our virtue, our reason for being all about buying things?
We are attached on our own soil. A war on terrorism has been declared. We invaded countries. What are Americans supposed to do? Go shopping. Brilliant and creative solution! What sacrifice we have to endure? None – that is supposedly to prove to the enemy how great we are. All the while, the very force that made American great and that has inspired freedom seeking people for generations has demoted to irrelevance – materialism and consumerism is now what American stands for. The American birthright has been sold for a bowl of pottage.
Another problem is that when there is nothing more in the national imagination beyond the next thrill or titillation, what is left but a constant seeking to fill the void with stuff and a willingness to believe whoever promises to deliver? When the Baby-Boomer generation of the 1960’s-kind thought that it was a good thing to throw off the “oppression” of the past, of the wisdom and insight of generations past, in order to make a brave new world that was supposed to usher in the Age of Aquarius, what can we expect but a descending into manipulation and triteness?
In the past, there was a governor on corporations’ and Madison Ave.’s attempt to move from persuasion to manipulation. There was a culture understanding that there were things more important than the individual and the self. There was a common understanding that happiness and satisfaction of life and a sense of significance in one’s own life went beyond things. We did not so much define our lives, our selves, by what we had or what we accumulated. Money didn’t maketh the man. Yes, yes, there was the whole “Keep up with the Jones,” but again, that was Madison Ave.’s attempt to manipulate us to buy more things so that we “kept up with the Jones.” Yes, there are certainly examples of greedy people, and all that. Yet, there was still an understanding that when all was said and done, out happiness didn’t rest on a new toaster or dishwasher or car or video game or jet ski or snow board or house or shoes or or or.
One of the aspects that were thrown off our societal shoulders by this generational thinking was religion. Those who believed in such superstitions where just ignorant and willfully manipulated by unscrupulous priests or pastors bent on control and power. Religion was just another occupier and oppressive agent that only tried to steal from people their person-hood, their joy, their freedom, their creativity. The thing is, the generation that through off the oppressive and moralizing force of the Christian religion had already been formed in those religious principles that had developed and been passed down for a millennia and a half – the wisdom and experience of generations past. They still were imbued with a mitigating inner force, whether they recognized it or not.
What would be left for this generation to pass on to their children? It ended up being a chaotic amalgamation of trendy fads, because the wisdom of the past was not to be trusted – it was oppressive. With each passing generation (X, Y), there was less and less of the taint of Christian moral structures – you know, like love God with your whole heart and love your neighbor as yourself.
From the stand point of the movers and shakers, this has been a glorious triumph. After all, how can you sell the idea that everyone has to consume, consume, consume when there is a cultural mitigating force that says that happiness is not found in material things, that we should focus on the well-being of our neighbor before our own, that we should give to the poor, that we should live simply, that we should not allow yourself to be consumed by treasures on earth, etc., etc., etc. When the mitigating force has been ejected from the culture, what is left? When the mitigating force was advertised effectively to be an enemy, what is left? When the Church buys into that idea, what is left?
The culture progressed to became in these days Post-Christian, and over the past four decades the Church responded by simple aping the zeitgeist of the culture, after all the leaders of the Church become those who were out to gloriously remake all of society in their bold, new image. It didn’t work. Aquarius did not come. The Church has became irrelevant and bankrupt (exceptions do certainly exist!) in its attempt to offer any positive alternative to a culture becoming more banal and self-centered. The Church as been duped by that which filled the void as the Church gave up its birthright. It is a nice circular phenomenon.
So, where are we now? People are certainly not happy. People have become profoundly insecure because there is the possibility that someone might take away all of our things, and by now our whole self-definition is based on material things. We don’t sacrifice for freedom any more, we demand more things. We now torture with the best of them. And the Church is irrelevant, no one listens, because we have become just like everyone else. The funny thing is, the later part of Generation X and a good part of Generation Y are coming to realize the fallacy in the Baby-Boomer endeavor.
I believe in the free-enterprise system, but there must be a governor because the hearts of men are exceedingly wicked, and selfish, and greedy, left unchecked. But, persuasion is not the same as manipulation. We have let ourselves be deceived by the Mad Men. They are very good at what they do! We are now, as Americans, worth not much more than being the world’s consumers. How sad.
Thomas Jefferson said that democracy was not possible without religion. We all know that he had great problems with religion and Christianity, but he recognized that there must be a mitigating force within the framework of democracy, and I say free-enterprise too, that calls to one to whom we are ultimately accountable – and that one is outside ourselves or our group or our nation. We don’t like to hear that, because we have bought the idea that we are an island unto ourselves. “I” am the final arbiter of all that I am and do and think and feel. As a seminarian a year behind me said, “I don’t believe in the resurrection, but I’m okay with that.” How lonely. How sad.
I hear too many people who work with people saying something is up… something is coming because something isn’t right… we feel it in our bones but don’t know how to describe it yet… don’t know how to put our finger on it just yet. A society can maintain this kind of existence for only so long. Can we not learn from history? Oh, I forgot, the past is oppressive. We are destined, then, to repeat it. We are coming to the breaking point.
Category Archives: personal
A Change
For the last six years, I’ve been avidly following the political, social, and ecclesial meanderings of so many people dealing with our current Episcopal Church (TEC) crisis. Like Christianity itself, there has never been a time when all was well in either Anglicanism or TEC or when everyone agreed, but during these past six years I have come to the conclusion that much of the problem, at least in this country, is generational. The most ardent of both those who are organizing a new denomination (in very American-Evangelical fashion, but not at all by Anglican-Evangelical norms, since Anglican-Evangelicals understand that Anglicans of whatever strip are Catholic) and those who will snub their nose at the worldwide Communion are generally of a generation.
Six years past, a whole lot of typing and argument and mental and emotional turmoil, and I’ve determined to let go of this whole thing. Those whose purpose in life is to fight and destroy in all their vainglory can go right on doing so. I don’t want to play any longer, basically because no real good is coming of any of it. Those who are determined, will be determined, and will do what they will do.
For me, I am sidestepping all this and returning to intention, persistence, humility, and simplicity as I strive to live out the Way of Jesus Christ. If this Church is ever to regain its balance (for surely it is out of balance now and getting more so everyday), the next generations will make it happen. Of course each generation will have its problems, but this present generation is worthy of an asterisk in the history books. The next generations are not out to usher in the Age of Aquarius or remake all things old into their new and sparkly image. So, while we will eventually winnow out the bad from the good contributions of this present generation, during that time of transfer of authority we will realize continued decline and the rebuilding will be all the more difficult. With God’s help, it will be so. Of course, what I just wrote smacks of generational arrogance, but for this piece I will claim myself to be a Baby Boomer, even though I am on the cusp and really regard myself as an X’er.
I am hoping that the ImagoDei Society and its ministries and the doing and thinking of the Red Hook Space will be the realization of a different way of doing things, that are really the very old ways of the Faith from generations past to generations present.
Long Friendships
I’ve spent the last two weeks on vacation, first with my brother, dad, and brother-in-law salmon fishing in Alaska. The first photo above, with me on the left (then Todd, Dad, and Tony), was taken with the Childs Glacier and Copper River in the background). The second photo is during a sunrise with fog surrounding everything, the third photo is mist rising off the Miles Glacier, and the final photo is me with two salmon caught in the Eyak River.
Then, I it was down to Portland, OR, to see two old friends. Steve was my best friend in High School, and I hadn’t seen him for nearly 29 years. While our time together was brief, it was wonderful reconnecting with him. Our lives lived were and are very different. He has a 23 and a 21 year old sons (I think those are the correct ages). He is a successful family man. His kids grew up in the same house – they have a real home. My life has been all over the place, and there are advantages and disadvantages to both kinds of lives. I was honestly surprised by how our memories differed on a variety of things. He talked about significant events that I don’t remember for the life of me, and the same with some of my memories.
Russ I met and grew to know while living in Akron and working at Kent. We went through a variety of personal things together and he became one of the people with whom I can share very personal things. Not quite a confessor, but a friend with whom I can confess. Not quite a spiritual director, but a friend with whom I can struggle through the faith. I am challenged by him and encouraged. My contact with Russ lessened dramatically when I left for New York and he ended up in Texas, and two years ago to Portland.
One thing I envied of Ashton was his life-long friendships. He is still good friends with and in regular contact with friends he developed in his latter elementary school days. To have people who have known you for so long and through all the stuff of life we suffer through, to be so well known, to be so comfortable with people must be a wonderful thing. I can sense that kind of wonderful from only the edges. I’m terrible at keeping up with people… that is my fault. I also know that many of my closest friends from years past would not easily abide with where I have landed concerning orientation and faith. Such is life, I suppose.
Place
Two weeks ago, we had a death in my family. My maternal grandmother died at the age of 87. She hadn’t been doing well for a while (several years, actually). She died relatively quickly, which frankly was a blessing because these kinds of things can often last for many, many months and become quite agonizing in the end. I remember my paternal grandfather’s death. He suffered.
For the past few years, she lived between Bedford, PA (her and my late grandfathers home for 40 years) and my parent’s home in Lima, OH. She would demand to be in her place – her home with her things and her memories and her life dependent on no one else. This was her place where she could just be herself and do what she wanted. This was her home where she had remaining friends. Everything was familiar.
When I was a child, I would spend a few weeks each summer with my grandparents, first in the mountains of Kentucky’s coal mining region (Pike County) and then in Bedford. I knew those places (as best I could as a kid and now). I remember vividly the smell of coal on fast moving, big coal trucks and slow moving, creaking coal cars being pulled along the railroad tracks. They were right there – I could touch them… mountain, train tracks, house, road, house, creek, mountain. I remember shucking White Half Runners and my great aunt making Apple Stack cake. Eating a piece of icebox cold Apple Stack cake on a sultry summer day was wonderful. I remember the sound of cicadas coming like waves from the mountain trees. I remember the aftermaths of terrible floods that ruined everything in the valleys. I remember driving on the curvy roads between Williamson, WV (their “downtown”) and up the holler to McAndrews, KY, where my other grandparents lived (the house my dad grew up in is still there). I remember my grandmother’s house in Kentucky, where I spent most of my time. That house suffered through one too many floods. I remember going to school with my paternal grandmother – she was an elementary teacher. I first learned to eat mustard on my potato chips that day.
I remember the poverty – tar paper shacks next to mansions, literally. Coal made some people quite wealthy. I remember the closeness of neighbors and the overpowering sense that this place was very different from my place, my home town along the southern banks of Lake Erie.
Then, it was to Bedford – a quintessential New England kind of town. “George Washington slept here” signs on the downtown buildings. The old, stately Bedford Inn and gold course was a short drive away, but seemed like it was worlds away. My grandfather used refer to gold courses as “cow pasture pools.” Why, I don’t know, but he was an avid golfer. One year, during the Bedford County Fair, I was walking through the grounds with a neighbor boy my own age (we actually got to walk to the fair on our own!), and I got on TV for the first time. Just a local station interviewing a couple boys at the fair, but I saw myself on TV. They talked funny there in Bedford. Not quite as funny as they did in Kentucky, but more kind of like Canadians. Then, of course, there was Shawnee State Park and the cool lake we used to swim in. It was a place different than my place in Vermilion, OH.
My grandmother always wanted to be in her own place. She would insist on being there (sometimes to the point of getting a bit violent about being taken back home). It didn’t help that she wasn’t remembering very well, either. She would be there a few months, but her health would deteriorate to the point when my parents had to go and bring her to Lima. She did not want to be in Lima! She did not want to be in my parent’s home, but her own. She would get well enough and then demand to be taken back. This cycle repeated itself for a few years. It was very tough on my parents.
She just wanted to be in her own place (and she was used to getting her way). I can understand wanting to be in one’s own place.
Now that all my grandparents are dead, I sense this loss not only of them but also of their places. I have no reason to go back to Belfry, KY. All my relatives are gone (except for a great aunt up one of the hollers). The train tracks have been pulled up as the coal mines closed. I didn’t even smell coal in the air two weeks ago. I was sad. I have no reason to return to Bedford, PA. Those places are gone to me now with the passing of those who made them real and available to me. Particularly in Kentucky, I no longer belong to that place… the place that is so terribly different from were I now live. There is a different kind of living, a different way of living, down there that is frankly more sane and civil that here in New York City.
A sense of place is important to us, I think. It helps define us and form us. Part of my formation happened in Kentucky and in Pennsylvania in my grandparents’ homes and in places very different from my own. I regret that with the passing of my grandmother I no longer have not only her, but the places she represented and the way of life found only in those places. It is a loss of connection, a loss of history, a loss of a bit of who I am.
What is our foundation? Some imperfect thoughts on BO33 & DO25 and General Convention
This is going to be a rambling journey through a variety of stuff, I think. That, I suppose, isn’t so unusual, but as I’m trying to make connections and put things in some sort of rational order so to make an argument (or statement) that makes some kind of sense, this is just what I have to do. I process “out loud.”
I attended the first week of the 76th General Convention of the Episcopal Church. I had a great experience seeing people, witnessing a process that can be tedious, but always precise. Our polity is different and regrettably hard for some around the world to understand.
I watched this video on YouTube for Michael Jackson’s “Man in the Mirror.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtGD6t75HS8 (not available to embed)
So much of our current culture drives us down a path that belittles and denigrates in one way or another our humanity and common good for the purposes of power, privilege, and greed. I can’t but head the words and the images of Jackson’s song and this video and say that this world desperately needs a different way of ordering itself. I think the Gospel of Jesus Christ presents us a way, but it is a voluntary way, a very difficult way, a costly way, a humbling and self-denying way, a way that will not be accepted by entrenched interests that thrive on maintaining the status-quo even if it means the death of the common good.
This different way in a Christian understanding is a way that is not possible by our own means or determination, but first by the transforming of our souls (the Cure of Souls) by God. It isn’t just institutional evil that causes and perpetuates our human ills, but firstly the evil that resides within all of our hearts – our rebellion against God’s good way, as the 1979 Pray Book Catechism stresses. We see from history that even religious institutions can often be humanity’s worst enemy!
Atheists and non-Christians do great charitable things, and we see many providing a far better example of the “caring for the least of these” than do many Christians, yet the way of which I speak comes only from God’s restorative work within our own souls. From that beginning point, institutions are changed by the people within them, our processes are improved, and our world is made better.
Some in this Church of ours (and the greater Body of Christ), have allowed themselves to be co-opted by some Systems of this World. This is true of liberals as well as conservatives, just in different ways! For example, I think that many people within The Episcopal Church have taken to an idea that the foundation of our work is a sort of psycho-therapeutic model that strives to make people feel good about themselves, a sort of institutional purpose that promotes self-esteem or being well-adjusted. If we make people “feel” welcomed, esteemed, and good about themselves then we have succeeded in fulfilling our Gospel mission. It is as if God is the great therapist in the sky (or the new-age kind of daddy-guru figure), rather than the great redeemer and restorer of souls.
For many, this way of thinking has replaced, for whatever reasons, the idea that the Church is to be about the “Cure of Souls” (predicated on the understanding that humanity has been impossibly burdened and bound by ways of thinking and being that separate us from God – sin – and irrevocably destroy true relationship with one another absent the restorative work of the Holy Spirit). I believe giving ourselves to this way of thinking and being has caused the Church to give over its vital purpose for a lesser one, to lose its reason for being (which might be shown by fewer and fewer people wanting to be a part of us). For people seeking a faith community of restoration, I think they recognize that in many ways our Church doesn’t look much different from the World – from those systems that perpetuate division, hatred, uncompromising attitudes, and the impoverishment of soul and the common good (even as we do some good works).
I have to ask what kind of foundation the current structures of this Church are being built. Are the structures able to withstand the test of time or the trials that inevitably come as the Systems of this World work their best to overcome and destroy the Way of God? I consider our current troubles and watch the actions and resolutions of General Convention, and I have to ask upon what foundation are we making our decisions. Do we consider the well being of the whole community as vitally important – in the U.S. and around the world – or do we continue to simply concentrate on our own limited and myopic goals and special interests? (It isn’t that I am not supportive of the desired outcomes of most of what is being proposed by General Convention as an example, but I question whether the reasons for the proposals are based on Christian precepts – understood through time and trial – or trendy precepts that have their origins in systems that in the end only perpetuate our continued boundedness by sin.)
Why do we do what we do? The injustice that infects this world, the bigotry and exclusion that overwhelms our societies, the selfishness that enables starvation, the myopic vision that encourages war and deprivation – all of these need to be called out and confronted, even unto death. Yet, why and how do we as the Church pursue the remedy of these things? For the Church, I don’t think the “why†or “how†rests on trying to make people feel good about themselves, to be self-actualized, or to be esteemed. That kind of psycho-social work is important and we should encourage and support it, but it isn’t the work of the Church. Our progressive sense of wellbeing, from a Christian perspective, comes from the results of a transformation of the soul. What good is it for a man or woman to inherit the world, but lose his or her soul? For the Church, we are to be about the Cure of Souls – salvation, forgiveness, restoration of relationship between God and man and between one another. It is profoundly difficult to give up one’s life in order to gain life. It is a long and hard row to hoe for the Church to stand in prophetic opposition to the Systems of the World, predicated on the salvific and restorative work of Jesus Christ.
What was (is) our motivation for BO33 or DO25? What is our foundation?
Michael Jackson, RIP
You know, it is the strangest thing. It is going on a week now that Michael Jackson died. I am surprised by how hard his death has affected me. I am really saddened by his death, almost like something inside of me has died, too. This is honestly unexpected.
I’ve been watching, reading, and listening to everything that has been going on since the announcement. There is, of course, the reporting of his phenomenal talent, but the reaction of people world wide… I’ve heard people say that his music was constantly positive and encouraging and inspiring humanity to make a difference in the world for positive change. This is true. Perhaps, because so many entertainers (particularly in certain genres) are so negative and foul and present to the world the most banal stuff, yet there was Michael Jackson. A New York Times report quoted a industry person saying that they will never be another world-wide rock star with so much appeal and influence and talent as Michael Jackson.
Perhaps it is the tragedy of his life. A childhood that never was and his sometimes bizarre attempts to reclaim it. I can’t imagine what is was like or him – adults from the earliest years doing not much more than manipulating him (and his brothers), lying to him, cheating him, using him, and his father was one of the primary culprits. Perhaps, I am just so sad to see a lost soul with so much talent and so much pain. Perhaps, it is that he was always there during my life and became so significant in times of our lives. Perhaps, I did expect him to die while I’m still around. There are those who hated him.
He had problems, big problems, and he didn’t seem to understand why people did’nt understand him – or perhaps believe him. Whether he really did abuse the boys or whether their parents were just another bunch trying to bleed him dry I don’t know. My suspicion is that he was innocent, but he certainly kept putting himself in situations where people could easily make accusations and exploit his vulnerabilities. Then, all the revelations about is three children that are not really his after all. Not his biological children. The man was messed up, but why? I think, because, of us – people, the public, the exploiters.
So, I downloaded several of his videos. I wanted “Man in the Mirror,” but iTunes doesn’t have it, for some reason. “Cry.” “Scream.” I’m just honestly saddened by his tragic death more than I ever thought I would be.
I wonder whether his death simply brings to mind people that I have been very close to and who are now in terrible situations. Perhaps, his death reminds me that those friends for whom I care terribly could come to the same kind of end. I do fear for them, and wish horribly that they would take the steps needed to make healthy decisions for themselves. I pray for a particular friend constantly. I could see his innocent heart, exploited by others, making terrible decisions and now so messed up, I could see him come to such an end.
Life is so precious, but the “systems of our world” work so hard to destroy the simplicity, trust, faith, and innocence that we have when we are children. Jackson seemed to long desperately for those things. What is left when a culture no longer values them? What happens when we are complicit in their demise?
May his soul find the peace and tranquility he so long sought after. Lord, by your grace and mercy. May we learn something… even a little something.
76th General Convention
So, next week I will be off to Anaheim, CA, for the General Convention of the Episcopal Church. I will be there from July 7th through the 12th working for passage of Resolution A177 concerning denomination-wide heathcare benefits (the research project I’ve been working on these past three years). We shall see how it fairs. The situation with the economy might impact its passage, but all around this proposal saves the Church money!
I’m looking forward to listening to the Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams, who will be giving an address. I’ve gone through several stages of feelings toward Rowan – from jubilation when he was made Archbishop (a real theologian as Archbishop of the Anglican Communion!), to frustration at want seemed to be ineffectual leadership concerning our Anglican troubles, to now thinking that he is one of the few in the midst of this ignoble fight that is acting like a real Anglican!
Since I’ve never been to L.A., I’m taking an extra day and a half to be a tourist – probably only enough time to do the standard stuff. I’m staying between Beverly Hills and Hollywood. Why not?
Campus ministry!
I’ve done some research… In the Diocese of Ohio, according to the latest attendance figures of all the four-year colleges and universities, there is a total student population of 178,651 within the boarders of the Diocese (the northern half of the state, above and not including Columbus). In the zip-code areas of current parish churches in the diocese of Ohio, there are approximately 165,829 students. There are 79,720 students in “college towns” with Episcopal parishes. In the personal, leadership, and spiritual development of students, this is a critical time in their lives. They are our future, they are becoming the movers and shakers of society, of business, of media, of politics, of war and peace, of the Church. It is tremendously important to provide them opportunities for discovery of the Gospel for the first time and for their faith development and Christian formation. That’s a lot of people at a very strategic and important time in their lives.
Campus Ministry: It is a fact, whether some want to face it or admit to it, that the future of this world rests in the hands of the students living and learning right now in our colleges and universities.
It is also a fact that for most mainline denominations, the support for campus ministry continues to wain and fail. Again and again I read of the ending of a college chaplaincy of The Episcopal Church, let alone all the other denominations. I wonder whether too many of those in leadership of mainline denominations have simply written off student ministry as a lost cause (even though giving lip service to its importance)? Among American-Evangelicals, it really is a funding issue, since they well realize that to influence the academy is to influence the world.
If we want to advocate for justice, say, or the precepts of the Christian Life (if we believe in them, that is, as being the way to honest freedom, peace, and inner joy), if we truly want to have an influence on the course of human events, then we must be involved in the lives of students, professors, and university staff. The majority of students entering the university these days are unchurched. In most cases, they have not been given a foundation upon which to make ethical or moral judgments beyond their own feelings or self-interest. They have not been given a foundation upon which to make judgments about legitimate religious expressions and cultic (in the venacular sense) groups. This is quickly becoming the common state of affairs, and student services staff fight against such things all the time (even though the underpinnings of the fight they wage is based on secular and often anti-religious positions).
“The World” has no problem asserting its influences on the lives, well being, and future direction of students lives. I worked with students for 20 years, I can attest to all kinds of “others” that simply want to exploit and manipulate students and turn them into consuming machines.
We should not continue to ignore the vital nature of university ministry by simply relinquishing the positive influence of the Gospel in academe and give students over to the deleterious effects of the negative influences they face every day. This is a vital time in human development, a strategic time to influence for the good, but we pull away and give over to the “principalities and powers of the air” our students, their future, and our own future well being.
Again, I have said that if we recognize the trends of our times (revealed repeatedly in study after study), we should realize that the historic traditions of Anglicanism play into the current “sense” of today’s students. Yet, it is not being realized.
There must be a way to reinvigorate campus ministry within The Episcopal Church and the Anglican Christian tradition in this country. It will not be upon the model in place for so many years – this is a big reason why so many ministries are failing and being closed. If the World looks at us and sees nothing much different from itself (themselves), then what’s the point? Why should people give a listen and consideration to the Gospel, since in their eyes those who claim it are just like them. Does not this Gospel change us fundamentally into a different kind of person… if we allow it, yield to it, and take it as our own? This doesn’t necessitate an Us vs Them dynamic if we remain in humility… the kind that is realized when we “love our neighbors as ourselves.”
Focusing on justice issues and good works without the transformation that happens within individual students by the life-changing experience of the Gospel is in the long run of little importance, IMHO. Re-formation (out of the Systems of this World and into a Life in Christ) must happen within individual students so to propel them to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humble with their God.
As we continue on in a Post-Christian environment, the idea of establishing living-forming communities and residences with students among our campuses can be a model that gives us both a financial and non-political/ideological means of engaging students in their faith development and Christian formation. As we give ourselves to the Christian Disciplines, God works within us to build within us the means of changing the world for the good.
It is my desire and quest to be engaged in the re-development of campus chaplaincies / ministries within the Anglican tradition. I think it is vitally important for the future of this Church and for the well being of not only the students, but for academe and our society.
Decisons, decisions…
I absolutely hate being involved in making decisions that pull me (rip me) in different directions because the alternatives are in and of themselves very good! Lord, what does one do? To be more specific, “Lord, what do I do?”
Then, if I say, “Lord, what do I do,” is that an attempt to relinquish my responsibility and give over to someone else that privilege of decision making so that I don’t have to feel the pain/confusion/angst of it all (and in some situations have to bear the brunt of the outcome), or is it a recognition that in this circumstance I just don’t know what is the best thing to do? Then, am I truly willing to hear the answer when and if it comes? Am I open to any possibility? One more thing, how much does my own want – separate from other right and good considerations – come into play? Is it possible to separate oneself from more selfish thoughts/feelings? Yes, it is, of course, but how do we know the difference between inappropriate selfish feelings – even legitimate wants – and the “right thing to do” because the option really is the right thing to do?
While I may “absolutely hate” having to be involved in such processes, I also know that even the trouble, the angst, the sick gut feeling is for a good end and the process itself is good. There are good results when we give ourselves to allowing ourselves to be challenged and changed.
My problem is that I doubt myself so much. Some have said that one of my (many) problems is that I think too much. I know from past experiences that in the end I tend to make decisions from my gut (when I’m not being slapped in the face, hard, with what should be obvious demonstrations of what needs to be done). I’ve also learned that I can depend on my gut feeling – when I am to the best of my abilities in a place of, “Lord, thy will be done.” I’ve made decisions when everything in me pretty much says, “I DO NOT want to do that!” but my gut says I need to – and the outcome was good.
I drive people crazy because I process out loud concerning these kinds of decisions. I can’t stop myself from subjecting friends to all my angst and confusion.
So, I have a gut feeling. Is it a selfish, uninformed gut feeling or a gut feeling as in, “Lord give me the desires of my heart,” gut feeling because God is directing? I guess if I remove the whole God thing, I’m just the type of person that would still feel the angst – or be far more selfish and be finished with it all. What is worse is that the decision my gut feeling is leading me to make right now doesn’t really benefit me! As a matter of fact, it will make life more difficult and in the end, fail. AND, the other option seems to have so many positives, and will even be beneficial to me as a result.
What does it mean when a very good thing is not chosen?
Right now, I am in that liminal state.
How much are the good outcomes of the decisions we make and their outcomes are simply deciding that this is what I’m going to do and the good results come more from changing attitudes and shifting outlooks to see positively the place we find ourselves or put ourselves?
So my gut feeling will put me in a place that is not as “easy,” not as serene, not as sure, not as stable, not as good for the resume, not a business-ly prudent for my future. So, why am I even considering this alternative? That’s part of my quandary!
Now, I have to try to write a sermon. Lord, help them tomorrow morning because they may just be subjected to an angst inspired interpretation of the scriptures.
Were will I be most useful? Where can my personality, my interests, my sense-of-things be most helpful?
Another Third Way
I need to be able to explain this without offending a bunch of folks, which is just impossible I know, but I need to try anyway. I just don’t know how to lay out my thoughts in a way that is precise in order to convey what I am really thinking, because right now my thoughts are a jumble in my mind. It would be too easy to land too far on one side of the argument or the other and not meaning to. Perhaps, just a series of statements and for now and leave it at that. In addition, it will be way, way too easy for me to sound like a reactionary, and I don’t mean to sound like a reactionary of any side. We’ve had way too much of that these past 6 years, already.
I keep thinking of the statement by the Mennonite pastor of Washington Christian Fellowship in D.C. that I heard one Sunday many years ago. In the context of his whole sermon, he said, “Jesus’ way is always a third way.” Ever since then, for really most of my adult life, I have always tried to look at issues and controversies, arguments and fights, accusations and declarations within the Church by asking, “What might be the completely different way that could be the third way of Jesus?” I believe that the attitudes and actions of most all things that separate us are a two-way-street. There is fault and blame on both sides, within both perspectives, attitudes, theories, theologies, visions, etc. We are human – we never get it “right” because of our limitations. So, looking for a third way to help solve the conflict or dispute or schism is where my mind goes almost automatically, now. Even though any thought of mine will really be only just another way.
After working with data over the past couple of years, there can be little debate that The Episcopal Church has suffered a tremendous decline in numbers and influence within our culture and our national life.
We have been on a 30-40 year experiment to remake this Church, and for many adherents of the experiment Christianity itself – just to very pertinent examples: retired Bishop Shelby Spong of Newark, the recently deposed priest trying to merge Christianity and Islam and seeing no conflict, the recently elected bishop of a small diocese that believes in the conflation of Christianity and Buddhism and proceeded to write his own liturgies and creedal statements.
There are plenty of other examples of leadership (clergy and lay) that are now in leadership that in years past would have been called skeptics of the faith, traditionally rendered. The skeptics may have been respected and honorably engaged to hear the why of the skepticism, but they would not been made leader of a Christian Church. It wouldn’t have made sense. Now, it is almost a virtue for a leader in this Church to be a skeptic of the foundational and traditional beliefs/principles of the Church catholic.
It’s like putting a person in charge of an airline company who doesn’t believe that aeoplanes can really go wondering through the air. The new leader believes he is on a mission to save people from the dreadful notion that we can safely go from one place to another by hurtling through high altitudes in a metal tube. What would be the result of hiring such a leader, regardless of how sincere he may be? If this happened, people would lose confidence in the airline (they have a crack-pot for a CEO), the airline would lose its place within the industry, ridership would probably tumble down drastically, and the airline would be destroyed. Of course, the solution to such a situation would be to find another CEO that actually believed that aeroplane flight is possible and safe. But, the conditions of the corporate culture at the time would not allow for the CEO’s removal.
The 30-40 year experiment continuing on in the leaders of this Church (and as a priest I have to include myself in this group) believing that the 2,000 tradition of the Church Catholic and Apostolic is obviously wrong in this modern age, that people are damaged by believing such superstitions, and that a new belief must be forged in order to save the organization and the religion (I don’t go there, however). We can look at denominations that have already gone down this path to see what the result will be. The Unitarian Universalists and the United Church of Christ can be examples for what will result if we continue with this experiment we are engaged in.
This path is also out of touch with the wantings and leanings of younger generations, so the hope that our path will divinely meet up with the rest of the people is false. The demographic data reveal this. We are beginning to see the results of the experiment and the results don’t look too good.
I’ll stop for now. I don’t know how well this has “come out.” I don’t know if this is how I really want to describe all this. But, I can say that the way the conservatives and the liberals within this Church have conducted themselves over the past 30-40 years has not worked and has resulted in schism, division, tremendous decline, and loss of good influence. A third way needs to be found.