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Author Archives: blgriffith
Wisdom
“The fear [more like profound respect leading to complete trust and adherence] of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; she inebriates mortal with her fruits…
“The fear of the Lord is the crown of wisdom, making peace and perfect health to flourish. She rained down knowledge and discerning comprehension, and she heightened the glory of those who held her fast.
“To fear the Lord is the root of wisdom, and her branches are long life.” [Sirach 1:14-20]
Unconditional
There is this little thing called “unconditional love” – this strange, alien, seemingly unattainable thing. To love, unconditionally. To be loved, unconditionally.
Over the last few months, I’ve been made to realize – forced to confront – how very far from this strange, little, glorious, horrible thing I fall. It pains me greatly, daily, this shortcoming, this failure of mine – it is never, ever just about me when such a failing is made real. This isn’t sentimentalism, BTW. It is diminishment all around, however.
Considering an other, one beloved of God, before myself – well, I like to believe it so. How in the world to pick back up, again? Yet, here I am.
We all imagine ourselves to be capable of such a thing, right? I strive for it, but in the end my conditioning in this narcissistic culture of ours, my fear, my faithlessness, my selfishness – all of it – wins the day, and that which gives contentment, gives honest peace, gives life-to-the-full (all for the sake of the other, and to be realized myself as a result) is put off further down the road… so many more miles down the road. It is never, ever just about me.
And we all lose out on a bit more… love. If I want to find my true life, I have to lose my life – give it away. So say we all. Right? How strange, how alien in our day (in any human day), is this unconditional love. I want to try, again.
On Facebook, where the above was first posted, a good friend of High School days responded, and I responded…
Lynn Duskey Gagnon – Most of the worlds greatest literature examines this very longing. I suspect, Bob, you are farther along on this path than you think. . .probably farther along at seeking it than most, and closer to it for the contemplation of it. I do a disservice to those around me by shying away from thinking too deeply about unconditional love, lest I fall into a great abyss of depression at what I might find. After all, is it really possible for humans, or is unconditional love strictly divine?
Bob Griffith – My goodness, Lynn Duskey Gagnon, from disco lessons to wondering whether unconditional love can only be of the Divine. It has taken us a long time to get here, I suppose. I remember when, and correct me if I am wrong, you pulled out of acting as a career partly because of things teachers required of you – limits you would not cross, and rightfully so for you at the time. When I was thinking about the same career path, I wonder now about where my own limits might have fallen – or actually fallen away. This thing about unconditional love – so hard to think of it beyond the conditional… how we’ve been conditioned to understand “love” and the giving and receiving of it. Is there a reckless abandon concerning love that we must give ourselves to, beyond what is comfortable or conventional or expected or accepted in order to find the unconditional aspect of it all? Is that what makes great actors great? Is that what enables one to love, mightily? Is there a limit, a boundary when crossed over, that leads to something destructive, counter to what we truly desire – whether being a good actor or one who might be able to tap the Divine and taste but a bit of unconditional love?
Pulled Out
Somethings, someone unexpectedly enters my life who pulls me out of myself – honestly so. Living in the City, to eke out a bit of “privacy” in the midst of crowds often means I have to kind of ignore others around me (even though I love watching people). Add to that my tendency to be in my head way too much, and then the reality that I have a hard time explaining myself to others so it is just too easy not to bother. Then, I get pulled out of myself and it is a wonderful thing, but it is confusing in the beginning because I’m not used to it and I mess things up more often than not. Yet, it is good to begin to notice all manner of things, once again (like on the subway talking to a Muslim student or the coach and thirty boys of a London Ignatian youth rugby team coming back from a “tedious” Mets baseball game). I am thankful to be pulled out, even in my messiness.
Subway Encounger
On the subway this morning, a young guy got on the train dressed in a way that made me wonder what Faith he was a part of. I thought, perhaps, Sufi (Islam). I went up and asked him – Sunni. He is studying to be an Imam. We talked about his studies and my studies in seminary here in New York (I told him I am an Anglican priest).
With all the controversy and fear mongering and accusation and everything else going on between Muslims and Christians – add Hindus, Buddhists, and all the like – one thing that will become ever more apparent is that people of faith, no matter what their Faith, will end up having much more in common with each other than any individual Faith with the prevailing culture. There are real differences between the Faith’s and those differences are to be respected, but in the end the walk of faith is a task and disposition – a wisdom – finding much in common among us all.
The question that is so present in my mind and heart these recent days is how I am to change, particularly with certain significant people, so that I can love them in ways that benefit them firstly, and not out my own fear or longing or insecurity or all that. How am I to change? How am I to change so that I am able to better love my neighbor, this young Muslim student, a significant other?
Spring of Purging
I think I’m going to make this spring the great “Spring of Purging.” I’m going to get rid of a lot of stuff that I’ve accumulated over the years… old electronics that are just hanging around, the last vestiges of non-digital/streaming (as in bills, magazines, DVDs, etc – although I will still write in my paper journal and probably buy my regular “summer books” in paper – though maybe not), memorabilia that I haven’t looked at in many years, furniture (sorry Mom, the chair), etc. Out with the old, as they say… Of course, the exceptions are people.
The Gift of Mercy
The Scriptural gift of Mercy is the capacity to feel and express unusual compassion and sympathy for those in difficult or crisis situations and provide them with the necessary help and support to see them through tough times. The merciful feel the emotional atmosphere around an individual or group, being sensitive to feelings and needs of others because the Holy Spirit is at work in the person. A key characteristic of the merciful is an ability to sense joy or distress in others. The merciful are drawn to those who are in mental or emotional distress. Christians with the gift of mercy are drawn to people experiencing emotional distress, and often make friends with those in need. The merciful seek to remove pain rather than find its benefits. Even when someone suffers as a result of his own disobedience, the gift of mercy concerns itself with soothing the person’s pain. Though not insensitive to the physical needs of people, the merciful are primarily concerned with the spiritual and emotional condition of an individual. (Source)
Assult / Beauty
From “Yearning: Authentic Transformation, Young Adults, and the Church”, by The Rev. Robert Hendrickson, pp 67-68:
“In the day-to-day lives of many young adults, they will be assaulted by images of at best banality and at worst outright cruelty. Advertising works on the premise that they are never enough, television creates a spectacle of emotional manipulation and invites them to cascade between feeling less than or superior to – megastores and strip malls take nature and bend it to serve only a bland commerce bent toward creating competitive identity that obscures our actual identity and blurs the particularities of the neighborhoods we live in and serve.
Somewhere along that walk from the font to the alter, in the life of virtue, the encroaching of cultural norms, values, and expectations derail us. The journey that we begin by being baptized into the life of Christ quickly gets sidetracked as we take paths that seem to shine a little more brightly. Then we find ourselves lost and without bearings – unable to see our true selves or true home through the ceaseless press and clamor.
The hollowness of the world cannot be filled with more of the world, but with more of that grace which flows of the sacraments and makes men and women more holy and more devout. Those struggling to find God amidst and despite the banality of much of contemporary culture will not find an answer in a Church that simply seeks to replicate that banality in our buildings, liturgies, prayers, or work in the world.
This is where beauty comes in. Beauty has the power to pull us up short – to force us to behold again. To behold all that God is doing around, in, and in spit of us. It demands of us a renewed seriousness as we stand in the middle of that which makes us know that there is more.”
Mystery
“That than which nothing greater can be thought.” – The ineffable mystery of God
Last song, last show
From Rainer Marie – I have a vested interest in one of the members! (Upload to YouTube, Dec. 18, 2006)