Monday, 15 October 2001
I baby sat my nephew Cory on Saturday. We had a great time at the zoo and building a fort in the middle of the living room. I'm remembering how much he wanted me to help him build his fort, so we could hide from his mom and dad when they came home. By that time of the day, I was getting tired and really didn't want to help him, besides, CNN was reporting a lot of new reports of Anthrax infections and all that kind of stuff. Thinking back, I'm embarrassed that I didn't not help Cory more then I did. Here was a little boy who simply wanted me, an adult, his uncle, to help him build a fort made out of chairs and afghans, and I was so very relucted to help. It is those simply things that he would remember. Instead of just waiting for his mom and dad to get home and me telling him to quick, hide, how much more exciting it would have been for me to have gotten in there with him. He is a good kid. We had fun. I wish I would have gotten out of myself at the time and helped him build a huge fort. I didn't get home from Todd and Laurie's until late on Saturday.

It was a strange weekend all around. Friday, I went the Gay Shorts (movies) at the Highland -- part of the Out in Akron Festival. The shorts were MUCH better then last year's, but many of the films still had a lot to be desired. I noticed all the couples and fell into this uncoupled funk, which made me start thinking about John from the past and Ned in the present. At Edge Water Park waiting for the Frontrunners guys to get back and while at the zoo with Cory, I noticed how he would so quickly gravitate to other little kids. Whether playing on a jungle-gym or looking at elephants, he would immediately go to the kids. I began to think about how all of us gravitate to those of like kind. No matter how open-minded or 'liberal' we are, whites, blacks, hispanic, Asian, male, female, conservative, liberal, educated, uneducated, gay, straight, we all tend to want to be with those who are like us. There is a comfort and unspoken understanding when we are around like people. Gay people hang out with gay people -- males with males and females with females. Blacks hang out with blacks. Teenagers hang out with teenagers. Couples hand out with couples. I don't really think that is a problem, unless we become exclusive and begin looking at the other groups with disdain. But even at a very early age and living with adults who encourage diversity, out human tendency is to be with those who are like ourselves.

I finally went to a movie -- Zoolander. I loved it. Stupid and vapid, but that is exactly what I needed yesterday. Afterwards, I went to Cabaret Q, the last event for Out in Akron. A lot of good talent! Lots of people were there. It was nice, but my attitude wasn't the greatest. It just seems there are not many people in Akron who show relationship potential. Feeling lonely was a bit emotion this weekend, and the prospects for relationship in the areas I live seem slight. I have a great bunch of friends that I value dearly, but it just isn't the same. Fall is here and the leaves are at their peek, but once again there isn't anyone to share all that with in that kind of way. Of course, then I began feeling sorry for myself -- who in the world could be interested in me and feel intensely for me. Why in the heck would they? What have I got to offer anyone? All those kinds of emotions. It was that kind of weekend. Zoolander was good for me, and good that I saw it alone.

Speaking of good friends, I read a very interesting article in the New York Times Sunday Magazine on urban tribes and in the vastly increasing demographic of never marrieds how urban tribes form a sense of family. More on that later.

Copyright © 2001 hyperSYNC.net